A typical stardoll story

I’m in the car, which obviously does not permit me to get onto the internet and freely gripe about how idiotic all of you are, so I took the time to write out the pathetic piece of crap some people refer to loosely as a “story” on stardoll. Upon realizing that this would take me a maximum of thirty minutes,  I realized that there were approximately 3 ways I could write the story

1.      1. A girl is kidnapped and harassed

2.       2.A girl is in love with a guy who doesn’t love her but ends up loving her

3.       3.A girl is engaged in erotic scenes for the story.

I decided to apply all three concepts to this wonderful work of literature.  Now, a normal author might begin a story in this way-

The wind rustled through the sun parched grass, whispering menacingly. A moonless night, not a human stirred in the blackness of the hours before dawn. Nothing but a small black shape, scuttling around hedges, hurtling over fence posts, all in silent, deadly agility. The shape slowed its pace as it neared the only light in the small neighborhood- the porch light of an old, quaint home, within which slept an average family, a mother, father, sister, and brother. Slowly, the figure stepped nimbly onto the sagging step and emerged into the light. It threw back its hood and breathed deeply. At first glance one could plainly see that this creature was most certainly not human, or any known creature of earth. It’s skull was elongated, its three eyes were cruel slits with an absence of irises, and its skin was so pale it seemed ethereal, glowing, flickering. Its six arms dangled low beneath its spindly knees and dwindled into ten claw-like fingers, and its breathing came infrequently in short, rattling gasps, comparable to the rattling of bones in a breeze. The creature grinned, parting a lipless mouth to reveal small, pointed teeth and gingerly laid a hand on the door knob. Their defenses had failed them; once he crossed the threshold, nothing would be able to stop him.

Sorry, I got carried away. Anyhow, I could have written this in fifth grade, yet it is comparable to, say, Shakespeare in relativity to the stereotypical “stardoll story”, which I will attempt to lower my standards enough to write presently. May I begin as the all begin-

I looked in the mirror and pushed my long brown hair behind my ear and put on some makeup.

MORE MORE??????

(just assume there are “more’s” at random intervals now, I'm too lazy to write them out.)

I didn’t think I was pretty. I went out the door on the way to school I saw my best friend Carrie “hi amy” she said. “Hi I said” we went to school together and then I saw him. He had shaggy blonde hair and blue eyes. “Hi, I’m Chris “ he said. “hi” I blushed. He walked away. I knew I was in love. I said goodbye to carrie and walked home from school when all of a sudden a van came out of nowhere and these people grabbed me! They tied me up and knocked me up. When I woke up I was in a small room tied up still. “HELLO?” I yelled.  Then the person who kidnapped me came in. I gasped in shock IT WAS CHRIS. “omg chris!” I yelled. He looked at me lovingly “hello carrie” he whispered. “why did you bring me here?”  he looked at me “because I love you” then he started kissing me and then we did it “CHRIS” I yelled. The next day he apologized to  me for kidnapping me and then we went home.

2 years later-

Me and chris got married, and we have a beautiful little boy, also carrie is our next door neighbor.

THE END.

kiss kiss emma